Quarter Life Crisis, my story.

Today's story is going to be a different one. As one wise man said, change is inevitable and it is a rule of life. Let's spice things up by talking about me. Yes, me. The person hiding behind the screen, the author of this blog. 

By the time I post up this entry, I've just graduated with a degree in Chemistry and I am lost and confused with the infinite choices presented before me. I am sure the majority of us, alike me, have ever felt lost at least once in a lifetime. Some of us may experience it twice,thrice,etc. The young adults are more likely to suffer a syndrome known as "quarter life crisis" and I believe I am going through it now.

I've always loved Science subject no matter what level of education I was in. When I was in primary school, I was most excited when we learnt about planets,stars and galaxies. Although we didn't do any hands on, I still love learning facts about the states of matter and everything in between. During this period, every adults around me glorify the "high pay" job like doctors and engineers. Anything associated with it is favorable and praised by the elderly. Even my own parents encouraged me to become a doctor. So I tell myself, I want to be a doctor. I studied hard and luckily, I've earned a place in one of the most "prestigious" school in my country; a Science-based boarding school or known as Sekolah Berasrama Penuh (SBP).

Long story short, I've discovered that I don't want to be a doctor when I was 15~16 years old. I just knew it. I want to be something else but I didn't know what it is yet. I proceed with my foundation study (the local version of A-level/O-level). It was in this time that I've decided to pursue my higher education in Chemistry. I am not entirely crazy over it but it was the most appealing field compared to Biology,Physics and Mathematics.

Unfortunately, after spending 4 years of undergraduate studies, I still have not figured out what exactly I want to be.

Again, my parents pushed me to pursue Masters degree and I reluctantly agreed. My logic told me to continue my study while I'm still "lost" in hope that, I'll find my purpose during or by the end of it. At least, I am doing something rather than wasting time doing nothing. So here I am, doing OK but living a flat, unfulfilling life.

The problem is, I don't even know what I want. When I ask myself the typical find-your-purpose-questions, I can't answer it. The best I can do is writing down cliche answers like having flexible time, a job that travels, financial stability,doing business,etc. 

I feel lost amidst the countless opportunities presented upon me. I know it's a first world problem but I am terrified of the uncertainty that awaits me. I am so scared of failing, of disappointing people around me, of getting hurt somewhere along the journey. I've become  accustomed to the "normal" that my conscious and subconscious mind  refused to step out to the unknown.

I feel weak, unworthy and a loser.

Worse, people around me doesn't seem to show the symptoms of having this crisis. It's as if I am the only one experiencing it. Whenever I ask for advice, I've always gotten vague and unsatisfying answers.

"Oh you'll figure it out"

"So if you don't want to study, what do you want to do?"

"Don't worry,just follow the flow"

Not a single deep, thought provoking advice.

I don't know who else to turn to for piece of advice. I don't even know whether people will actually take time to read my lengthy post. But just by writing it, pouring my deepest conflict for the whole world to read is liberating. I feel slightly better now and I hope someone will find this helpful, that you are not alone in this imaginary battle created by our primal instinct to achieve success.

A'pieu Start Up Pore Primer

Bonjour unicorns!

A'pieu is a brand that always catch my attention whenever I browse Korean cosmetics online. The prices are cheap but they still give efforts on the packaging and performance of the products. Unfortunately A'pieu is unavailable in my country so the only way of purchasing are through online. I've got this primer along with the Etude House Foundation that I've reviewed before. 

This product received an approval from Get It Beauty by getting No.1 during the blind test for face primers. If you're not familiar, Get It Beauty is a Korean talk show that discussed beauty trends and health tips for women. The "blind test" is a regular series within the show where they let the audiences in the studio to test certain products without knowing the brand. Later on they will vote on which item they favor the most. 

The primers have variation depending on one's skin concern. There's 3 options which are aqua,pore and bright. Obviously,I've chosen the pore primer since my biggest issue is enlarged pores. 

The squeeze tube comes in a faux metallic grey color with blue accent at the front. Everything is in Korean except for the front body. I love the narrow oepning,it prevents the primer from squirting out and gives decent control for my desired amount.

I have no problem with white primer because it will end up invisible once blended on the skin. I noticed an ever so slightly scent that's similar to the Porefessional primer. If I were to describe it, it smells like a fresh cologne. 

The texture is somewhat like an emulsion,not quite solid or liquid. It's not silicon-ey at all. When I proceed to blend it out,it legit melts off due to the heat of my skin and blend like a moisturizer. Super light and watery. So weird but I like it.  

I don't notice any blurring effect.

When applied alone. I didn't see any of my pores got blurred. However when I use foundation on top of it,my skin become poreless! I also love the moisture it gives when I'm blending the primer. My makeup do lasts longer than normal even when I'm wearing a low key foundation like the Essence Pure Nude Makeup Foundation. It also doesn't clog my pores compared to my other face primers. I can see why the audiences were wooed by this primer. 

If A'pieu is available at your place,do yourself a favor and buy this primer (or any depending on your skin's concern) ;)

Essence Pure Nude Makeup Foundation Review,Swatches

Good morning (or evening)!

Today, I'm gonna review one of the most difficult item to find in my nearby drugstores; Essence Pure Nude Make-up Foundation. I have been hunting this and the Pure Nude highlights (that KathleenLights raved about) for a few months. It's sold out everywhere in KL :(

I've finally end my hunt and it's so worth it! 

The plastic bottle is identical to the Essence Stay All Day foundation. The color combination accentuate the "pure nude" concept which is satisfying to my eyes. There's nothing outstanding with the appearance but the large font "nude" will definitely make you look twice. I've reviewed the All About Matt! Foundation  and both packaging are 100% different.

The foundation claims;

  • natural finish
  • no makeup-up feel
  • contain moisturizing glycerin and vitamin E
  • suitable with all skin type
  • dermatologically tested

The consistency is really watery which makes sense since the first ingredients listed is aqua; water. At this point it acts more like a tinted moisturizer than foundation. I've picked up the lightest shade 10 pure beige and it matches my skin tone well. 

I've tried using two tools for application which is a damp sponge and a flat top foundation brush. It can't be distinguished from the picture but using the brush gives more coverage than the damp sponge. I personally like the latter.  The foundation itself is light to medium coverage and I do spot conceal my rosacea using the same foundation.

Regarding the claim, I personally agree with the first three. If you manage to match your skin tone with any of the available shades (sadly, there's only three shades available),it is a splendid foundation for "my skin but better" day. I love how natural it looks while feeling weightless on the skin.

At the end of the day, bits of foundation on my nose have already gone and the foundation does transfers when blotting with tissues. All is forgiven though since you can't beat the price tag. It's available at your nearby Watsons or Parkson shops.

Essence is a wallet friendly brand which offers decent quality makeups and this is why most Essence products are sold out in my area ;)
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